Is it just me or is "Dear Prudence" the most insipid syndicated column? Today's installment was particularly irritating:

Prudie,
Could you please tell your straight readers that when they meet an attractive gay person of the opposite sex that it is never a compliment to say, "What a waste." What does this comment mean anyway—that because the person is sexually off limits they lead no sort of life of their own? Or is it some offhand attempt to compliment the gay person's looks? I don't get it. I have often been tempted to respond with, "Let me assure you that nothing I have is being wasted; it's all being put to very good use." Thanks, Prudie.

—Out in Atlanta

Dear Out,
Prudie believes you are misinterpreting the remark. Rather than implying that the gay person has "no sort of life of their own," Prudie finds it to mean, "You are GORGEOUS." (And it's the straight person's loss that you bat for the other team.) It is meant both as a compliment and a lighthearted statement. As you may have divined, Prudie has made this comment, herself, and always to a big smile in response.

—Prudie, flatteringly

If I ever meet Prudie, I hope she will put a similar spin on the "nice ass" comments I will allow myself to make. After all, I will only be complimenting her!